Vampire Pigs Trick ‘r Treating in the Snow

Here are a few updated trailers from blogs of Paracinema past and a few new trailers that have caught my eye over the past couple of weeks.

I'll start off with Trick 'r Treat which as previously written about, is finally making its way to our home movie viewing system of choice. It is nice to see that this news is still ringing true with a badass, brand spankin' new, official Warner Bros. website. Of course, a new website always equals to a new trailer, which is even better than the one that came out a few years back. This trailer really makes me excited to see this film when it comes knocking on my door in full costume this October. However, it also makes me real fucking annoyed that this movie did not come out in theaters too. Check out the new site and trailer here.

Next up in the update department is the killer hog film, Chaw, which I had previously posted a teaser for not all that long ago. Well, a few weeks back the new trailer for Chaw hit the webs, complete with some better looking, but still brief pig action. I dig this trailer quite a bit and it looks a lot different from what you saw in the teaser. It is much more polished, and it has a bit of a wooded survivalist film look to it at times. I love me some survivalist films whether they are good, bad, or mediocre. Unfortunately, as with the previous teaser, this trailer is in Korean language only, but no matter, you wont have trouble understanding that the piglet is huge, hungry, and on the hunt for the tastiest of treats…man. Here is the trailer in case you aren't capable of sight and didn't already notice it right down below. In that case, how the hell are you reading this?!



Alrighty, now I am on to a few new trailers starting with Daybreakers. Here's a plot for ya…"In the year 2019 (wow! That's right around the corner!) , the earth's population has become infected with a Vampiric virus, only leaving a few humans left for the bloodsuckers to feast upon. As their human blood supply is quickly diminishing, the Vampires have taken to farming humans to keep them from going completely instinct and even have been unsuccessfully attempting to come up with a blood substitute, all before running out of the crimson source that keeps them alive. A researcher, along with an unknown covert group of Vampires, have found a way to possibly save the human race, but will it be too late?" Mix one part Matrix, two parts Ultraviolet (Yuk), shake, garnish with a Blade 2 blood red cherry, and what comes out looks something like Daybreakers. Directed by the Spierig Brothers (who both directed the dismal 2003 Aussie flick, Undead), I wasn't so hot on this trailer the first time around, but after a second viewing, Daybreakers looks quite promising. Though, I think Ethan Hawke is a major douche bag, I love Sam Neill and Willem Dafoe, and so those two names have my anticipation slightly raised. Plus, I love Vampire movies…when they don't suck that is. We will find out January 8th, 2010 when the film is released. LOOKOUT!! Trailer below!



Last, but certainly not least, is a trailer for a film I had heard nothing about until I visited this lovely little blog one lovely little evening. I am so glad I saw this one as this film jumps right up from none, to the near top of my radar ladder of love. The film is called Whiteout and stars Kate Beckinsale as, Carrie Stetko a U.S. Marshal stationed in Antarctica where she is investigating the continents first ever murder case. Big problem for Carrie is she only has days until winter begins to solve the murder case, or she will be left in total darkness for six months with a killer on the loose. Directed by Dominic Sena, who also helmed the fantastic 1993 film Kalifornia, Whiteout is an adaptation of the 1999 graphic novel of the same name. I'd prefer not to look into the film much more since I don't wanna ruin anything for myself before the September 11th release (ya know, in case the killer is a monster!!), but man, this trailer is fantastic. And I mean, FANTASTIC…I can’t help but see the isolated winter setting and think Carpenters classic, The Thing, but that is an expectation I need to quell with the quickness knowing the film will likely not live up to such anticipation. Either way, I love snow and winter as settings in movies to the point that I would marry it, and it is nice to see the immensely gorgeous Beckinsale in a film that actually looks good. Plus, the tag line "See your last breath" is enough to inspire a little movement in my pants. Get a sweater and a hot cup of Swiss Miss, for the trailer is down below (zero!).



Okay, I'm done with you for now, but I hope you enjoyed your stay and I fully expect to see you round this way again soon. Very soon….BWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Who Broke Wind?

I am admittedly a huge fan of M. Night Shyamalan's films. I love The Sixth Sense, Signs, and I consider Unbreakable to be one of my all time favorite films and a near masterpiece of emotional character driven drama found in what is essentially a superhero film. Heck, I even really liked Lady in the Water, a film that has moments of brilliance even with its many faults. However, I really hated The Happening and thought it was a major letdown in a million and one different ways. This is a director that makes technically amazing films, while drawing out performances from actors that are just top notch. Surprisingly, neither of those attributes were anywhere to found in The Happening. No matter how bad that film is though, it didn't take away all of my faith in Shyamalan as a director who's work I will always look forward to.

When I first heard Shyamalan was directing the live action version of the Nickelodeon animated series Avatar: The Last Airbender I was curious as to what the show was all about. I watched tiny bits and pieces of the show (probably less than an episode all together) a few times, trying to get an idea of what I was to look forward to in the next Shyamalan film, hoping the subject matter would be of interest to me. I got that the gist of the show had something to do with mythical Asian culture and it had Martial Arts in it, that's about all. To honest with you, Martial Arts was enough for me to get somewhat excited about this live action film, but I wondered how much Martial Arts would be in the movie. With the recently released teaser trailer for The Last Airbender, I think I got my answer to the action question and a whole bunch of others too.

This is a great teaser trailer with how simple and to the point it is in the setup and execution. Just the youthful character, Aang (as played by new comer Noah Ringer) doing nicely shoot, beautiful looking Martial Arts practice moves, and also rocking out with a bow staff like a mo-fo for the bulk of this lengthy teaser. Only until almost the very end of its run time do you get a hint of the epic-ness to come, and boy…it looks just unbelievable. I am really looking to see Shyamalan show of his directing skills in a way he has not been asked to before with the action elements this film would entail. I think he is going to knock this one outta the park after seeing this teaser and I almost have forgotten about The Happening. Damn. I remembered.

Here, watch the trailer for yourself; I put it right down there for you…



Right?! Shit is off the meat hook son!

I'll give you a quick IMDB synopsis of the film…"The story follows the adventures of Aang, a ten year old successor to a long line of Avatars, who must put his childhood ways aside and stop the Fire Nation from enslaving the Water, Earth and Air nations." Sounds good to me and I am happy to have figured out what an Airbender is. The Last Airbender is set to be released July 2, 2010, which is a long time form now, but I'm sure there will be plenty of hype building up as that time draws near. I now cannot wait for that day and in the meantime, I will being doing horse stance up until the movie is released.

SS Hell Cramp

Being banned outright by the UK and tagged a Video Nasty is something I would consider a good thing for a movies reputation, since being banned sorta makes a film more risqué and exciting to watch if you will. Of course, I don't mean a heartfelt romantic comedy with horsies would benefit from such a label, but horror and exploitation films falling victim to such censorship will certainly raise the interest eyebrow of most fans of those genres. Unfortunately, expectations can become high when watching a film of this ilk, and that can ultimately lead to disappointment if the movie doesn't fully live up to the hype built up by your own mind. 1977's Nazisploitation film SS Hell Camp (directed by: Luigi Batzella) falls into this outright banned category, which based off the title and genre, isn't really much of a surprise, now is it.

SS Hell camp (aka The Beast in Heat, La Bestia in Calore, and plenty more aka's) being called SS Hell Camp and also being a Nazisploitation film means that it has...well, Nazis in it. Nazis that are trying to create the "master race" led by SS officer, scientist, and sex deviant, Dr. Ellen Kratsch (Macha Magall), who's experimentation, results in the "not so Nazi" looking Man-Beast (Salvatore Baccaro) with the sex drive of a…well, mutated Man-Beast injected with aphrodisiacs. The Beast is of course as horny as a unicorn, and thanks to the ever so kind Dr. Kratsch, the Beast is allowed to have women in his cage. Unfortunately for the women, they aren't there to play some Super Nintendo and eat nacho chips (!), but to be raped by the raging sex Beast, as Dr. Kratsch and her crew of Nazi minions sit back and enjoy the show. Supposedly, the Beast is supposedly supposed to mate with his female cage guests, but instead looks like he's humping everything "but" their baby-making hole. Even worse is they end up dead in the process…brilliant idea for creating the master race isn't it?

As CRAZY! as all of that sounds, a good chunk of it happens right at the very beginning of the film. In this first 7 1/2 minutes of SS Hell Camp, you will be subject to: The Beast, a brief cock shot, a naked lady, poorly aimed rape, lesbianism, and of course, Nazis. Sheesh…I'm already worn out.

SS Hell Camp moves onto a group of Italian revolutionaries, that have been blowing up bridges, and just making general trouble for Nazi Captain Hardinghauser (Edilio Kim) and his Nazi regime. This is probably because Capt. HARDinghauser is to busy tossing some baby batter into (or onto) a beautiful undercover resistance fighter, instead of catching any of the freedom fighters and stopping them from further sabotage. All of this nonsense infuriates his superior officer who finds that Capt. Hard-on-hauser may need a little help with these Italian rebel do-gooders. In comes Dr. Kratsch to help Capt. Hard-in-you with his resistance problem, by lending her demeaning sexual based torture skills to pry out information from POW's.

That's pretty much what SS Hell Camp is all about, I mean, there really isn't much of a coherent plot at all, it almost feels like two different films from when you are with the revolutionaries, to when you’re with the Nazis…namely Dr. Kratsch. Since I'm talking (?) about how the film feels like two different movies, this may be a good time to go over the positive and the negative aspects of SS Hell Camp.

So, the rebellion segment of the story is boring and lame to the point of me not caring for getting into too many characters and their pointless plots. However, that's only the beginning of the tragedy that befalls anyone who decides to watch SS Hell Camp.

It isn't a badly shot film for the most part…I think? It was kinda hard to tell since a few of the battle scenes and some of the bigger Nazi stuff, is footage from the film "When the Bells Toll" (Quand Suona la Campana), a film directed by...get this…Luigi Batzella! What a small world!! So, this footage from a much better looking movie, with apparently a lot more cash, is poorly inter-cut into SS Hell Camp to make up for the lack of budget, and it's embarrassingly obvious to make things worse. It looks like the battle footage used is from a movie made 15 years earlier and then dragged through a straight row of warm taints. It doesn't look the same at all is what I'm trying to say. Even the battle action is really boring, with maybe only one fight scene towards the end that is slightly enjoyable.

I should also add that the dubbing in SS Hell Camp is some of the worst I have seen. It may not be as epic as saaay...something like Pieces, but it's pretty damn close. I guess the dubbing isn't all that important since the dialogue is also lackluster anyways. This could possibly have a lot to do with English translations and not the fault of the writers and filmmakers, but still, it is not good dude.

I guess I can move onto the good, well I guess better things about SS Hell Camp and more so, the things that are just there for regurgitation. Macha Magall is pretty good as Dr. Kratsch and is strangely attractive in a way. At times she is very pretty, at other times, namely when she is being sadistic, she looks like a sick and twisted Nazi sex fiend. She uses her sexuality and sadistic sexuality in general, as a device of torture to get information out of rebels. In one scene, Kratsch is showing HardONhumper how "she" goes about interrogating nude and chained male prisoners. She takes her top off (!) and starts kissing on and rubbing herself all over one of the male rebels, when another of the older rebels yells for her to "Please stop!" Kratsch does stop, but only to cut off the older rebel's dong! Dumb ass.

I also loved a scene when the village Priest Don Lorenzo played by the great Brad Harris, is being detained by Hard-dong-hauser and his cronies when the man of God yells out "Oh Dear Lord…Forgive me!!" And breaks free from the grip of a couple of Nazis that had him in custody and then proceeds to beat the shit out of almost all of them! It was such a great scene and even when the Nazis somehow find a way to re-detain him, he still finds a way to escape! It's awesome!

Now, earlier I was talking about movies that have a lot of hype behind them for being banned or whatever the case may be and how most do not really deliver on the high expectations. SS Hell Camp certainly delivers the goods in the "Wow…this movie's fucked up" department 100%. Along with the dong removal from a moment ago, SS Hell Camp also has a female rebel who after being raped by a Nazi, is then shot in her bologna sandwich. There's also the scene when the Nazis are attacking some of the Italian locals looking for rebels. A woman's baby is taken by the Nazi's, thrown up into the air, and then shot back down!

One of the most fucked scenes in SS Hell Camp for sure, is when Kratsch gets her hands on a large group of rebels; she gets a chance to really unleash her brand of sexual torture. Torture that would make the Marquis de Sade cringe mind you. In this pretty long scene, you see a ton of completely nude men and women (!), who are being tortured in various ways. One guy is hung upside down while being whipped and dunked into water, one of the female rebels is having her fingernails ripped out with pliers, another girl is having her stomach eaten by a couple of hungry rats that are suspiciously very similar looking to guinea pigs, and as all of this is happening, the Beast can be seen raping yet another victim in the background! This Beast rape is by far the strangest thing I have ever seen in a movie and I should preface that the women of SS Hell Camp are from a time well before "trimming." The Beast is done with his deed as it seems, when he then decides to start ripping the girl's pubes out and he begins to eat them! It's sooo gross and the pubes have little pieces of flesh in them! Blech. Made me think of a time when I was eating Thanksgiving dinner and I pulled a hair out of my mouth…how I didn't puke turkey up right there, I'll never know.

So yeah, SS Hell Camp definitely shows up for the prom in the shock department, completely decked out in straight up sleaze. I personally love me some sleaze, but some of the things in this film are a little much, but I did still kinda enjoy them to a certain extant…I guess. I just have to say that even with a huge abundance of sex, nudity, violence, and just straight Exploitation, SS Hell Camp is just too damn boring, and all of those things aren't enough to keep me interested. I could recommend this film to a fan of these types of films for no more than a rental, watch, and return, not a buy (unless it has killer extras!). You could maybe call it a must see for what it is, and to say you saw it, but otherwise it is a terrible film with almost no redeemable qualities whatsoever. Tread lightly lovely reader, tread lightly.

Special (2006)

"I used to dream about flying. It went the same way every night. I realized that I could fly. No, that’s not quite right. I realized there was no reason I couldn’t fly. And after that I float off the ground and soar above the city. But I haven't had that dream in awhile now. Lately, I dream about more ordinary things like doing my laundry, shopping for groceries, or riding on elevators. I wonder why that is..."

I watched Special. I entered into it with cautious optimism. I completed my viewing with cautious optimism. After giving it much thought, I am now comfortable enough to say that I enjoyed this film. Still I straddle the line and don't know whether to give this a recommend. There's a good chance a huge cross section of people would not enjoy it.

Special is the story of a man, Les, who is taking an experimental drug. Les believes the drug is giving him super powers when in fact it is simply making him hallucinate. That's it. The meat of the story is Les's self exploration and personal journey. It may sound boring and anticlimactic (especially if you have seen the trailers) but that internal journey stuff really does it for me. Special was just pretentious enough to be effective. That line is ever so fine and I can easily see someone being totally turned off by the movie's posturing.

Michael Rapaport's portrayal of Les was shockingly good. Every role I have ever seen Rapaport in has left me with an unmistakable desire to punch him. Put lightly, I don't like him. He stole this film. I wanted to hug him in every scene! He was awkward and sad in a painfully sweet and endearing way. The supporting cast was fab as well. Josh Peck, ya know, from "Drake & Josh" fame... No? OK. Well Josh Peck is wonderful to watch. I adore this kid. Such a charismatic guy! Rapaport's love interest (who I knew from "Friends") is adorable. The Maggie character isn't in the forefront of the film, but when she finally gets her moment she is captivating!

What I'm getting at is this, Special was effective for me on numerous levels. I bought into the journey and the self examination. Will it effect you the same way? Who know... but it's worth a try.

The 2009 Paracinema Father of the Year

Hey kids! Make sure if you have never seen Oldboy (and shame on you if that's the case) that you get your parents permission to read this blog. Spoilers are all over the place and I would hate to be the one to ruin the film for you…kay?!

In honor of father's day, I thought it a nice gesture to honor a cinema dad that is the definition of father of the year. A father that would do anything (including cutting out his own tongue) to keep his own daughter safe from the knowledge that he is her father, on top of being her lover. A father that would go all the way for, and with his beloved child, thus proving that incest indeed is best. A father that would prefer to rearrange his memory to forget the fact that he is banging his only daughter because he just so happens to love her and would prefer to bang her without knowing that she came out of the same place that is now inside of her. That man is the one and only...drum role please...Oh Dae-su!! Paracinemas father of the year! Congratulations to you and all of your future inbreed endeavors and hope those kids don't turn out too deformed.

Happy Father’s Day all!!!!

The Hunger (1983)

The Hunger has been on my netflix instant watch list for an eternity. I've skipped over it so many times that I toyed around with the idea of just deleting it and calling it a day. I'm never going to watch it, right? Today, as I clicked through the endless line of DVD covers in my instant queue, an unseen force compelled me to click on that wispy and vague cover art. I was immediately blasted back to the 80's.

The opening scene of The Hunger may be my new favorite 10 minutes ever put to film. The Bauhaus' Bela Lugosi's Dead begins to play and sexy 80's people begin to romp around in sexy 80's garb. They smoke their sexy 80's cigarettes and gyrate under sexy 80's strobe lights. I would've been sold without the well placed Bauhaus tune. Since it is one of my favorites, it just added to my enjoyment of the moment and I instantly fell in love. This brief opening gave me goosebumps. There was no way it could get any better. Until it did. As the super smokey club scenes flashed to "seduction" scenes I sat slack jawed. There is no dialogue, just music and sex and David Bowie. Then there is violence and blood and a monkey and I am at the mercy of this film. David Bowie is sex. Screw Twilight. This scene alone fills me with vampiric dreams. This makes me want to run around for eternity, young, gorgeous and devoid of any moral conscious (with David Bowie). After that opening, this film could take me anywhere and I would go without question. Oh, and it went. It went all over the place.

I would have been content if this film had been a super stylized, sexy tryst. Although it remained super stylized, the tone changed almost immediately. Our "vampire" protagonists, John (Bowie) and Miriam (Catherine Deneuve), are not your typical "vampires". I'm going to keep calling them "vampires" because they simply don't fit the conventional mold. They have no aversion to sunlight, they use nifty knife necklaces to slice open victims, they don't turn into bats and *gasp spoiler* they aren't immortal! At least John isn't...

I am not spoiler girl. If you waited 26 years to see this film like I did, you deserve to watch it with fresh eyes. Here's the general plot which you can skip: Miriam is a mama "vampire" whose current companion (John) is suddenly and rapidly aging. Miriam is not surprised as this seems to be what happens to the companions she creates. John and Miriam approach a doctor studying aging. This doctor happens to be the nubile Susan Sarandon. Miriam sets her sights on the doc and a sexy lesbian thrall ensues.

The Hunger explores mortality, lust, codependency and the science of aging. It is dated but in a way that works for the film. There is no shortage of wind blown drapes and billowing cloths. Visually, it is very much an 80's music video. This film explores vampirism and is very willing to toss stale conventions aside in favor of a more modern flair. The Hunger is an 80's movie. That fact works in its favor. I love how drenched in the era it is.

You can see by this blogs focus what I enjoyed. I was unimpressed by the lesbian scenes. In 1983 this may have been scandalous but I find I'm rather desensitized to it. It didn't add anything to the film. If you read write ups for The Hunger it seems the girl on girl action is the focal point. That's sad because there is so much else going on. This film isn't for everyone. It is vague at points and very ethereal. There also isn't much bloodshed. Love it or hate it, it's a nice addition to the vampire pantheon and I will most definitely be revisiting it.

Your Mother's like A Doorknob...Everyone Gets A Turn!

Going into Mother's Day, my expectations were meek at best, and it being a Lloyd Kaufman production didn't help all that much either. As a genre film fan, I have a lot of love and respect for what Lloyd Kaufman does and has done in the past, but I still think a bulk of the films (mainly newer) are let downs even in terms of the Troma type quality of movie making. Mother's Day is actually directed by Lloyd's very own brother from the very same mother, Charles Kaufman, who hasn't had quite as much as Lloyd in terms of movie credits, but has done some film work.

I figured Mother's Day would be another one of those cheap holiday themed Slasher films that were the hot thing at the time, but the film turns out to be more of a spoof of the Slasher genre. At least for the first half that is, which would be the most logical place to start. With a silly, but pretty cool opening double death scene involving expendable characters, Mother's Day moves right on into introducing you to the three main female protagonists of the film. Their introduction is actually done in a clever way with it being the credits doubling as a slide show and voice over of the three girls (who refer to themselves as the Rat Pack?!) talking about all the fun they had in college together, how they will forever need to keep in touch, and wonder where they might be in another ten years. Segue into the present (?) time when we get to meet the three best-est friends living their individual lives as they prepare to once again meet up for a weekend getaway/yearly reunion.

Each one of the ladies has gone completely different ways in life. Trina (Tiana Pierce), is a successful Hollywood starlet which is obvious from her fabulous and extravagant pool party, complete with ladies on roller skates, belly dancers, and a dude passing out after bangin' a rail of coke! Our first awesome impression of Trina is when she says to one of her party helpers,"Tell Joshua to stop jerking off in the kitchen and bring out some ice!" Who beats off in the kitchen when people are around?! Moreover, why on earth would you want them handling ice cubes that could end up in your drink?! Jackie (Deborah Luce) is the working woman with a stay at home, jobless, coke-head, artistic boyfriend that is obviously just using Jackie for a place to crash with the bonus of some occasional intercourse for added scumminess. Though Jackie's meat packer tells her that he is jealous of her structured career claiming it is very difficult for him being so sensitive and filled with so much art, all while he is doing a line…in the morning. Rounding out the tampon trio of women is Abbey (Nancy Hendrickson), a not so old old maid that is very sheltered and controlled by her grumpy bitch ass mother. Nothing funny happens with Abbey and that's probably cause she's a boring girl with nothing coke related going on.

As the girls meet up and head out into the woods for their camping reunion, everything seems to be going as you would expect in a Slasher film, but as I mentioned before, it is with a lot of humor that is very clearly on purpose. There are some funny and very random moments, for example, when Jackie is leaving her apartment complex to meet up with the rest of the Pack, she tells her black doorman to have a nice weekend. He then responds with "how am I supposed to have a nice weekend stuck here in the city?" Jackie's reply to him is "there is plenty to do in New York if you're free for the weekend!" At that point, the doorman gets up and repeatedly yells "free for the weekend…free for the weekend? I'll never be free as long as I'm a Black man in America!" Following the satirical trademarks of Slashers past, the Rat Pack go to pick up some important supplies (aka booze!) at a general store where Jackie tells the country bumpkin store clerk where they are headed. His response is something along the lines of "don't you girls go messin' round up in dem dare woods ya hear!" This is when the rest of the Pack come into the store with "silly and wacky" decorated paper bags over their heads, knocking over a bunch of shit before they take off with out picking up their mess, or even buying anything.

It quickly becomes clear that this so-called Rat Pack is filled with three obnoxious jerks that think they're the shit and they are probably the only ones that think this way. I mean, they call them selves the Rat Pack, but there are only three members?! There might be more than three members of the real Rat Pack that are still alive, than there are in this group of lame droops. There's at least 8 official members of the Brat Pack and a few more that are on the cusp of being down with that hot young gang of troubled teens that were in their 20's. Hell, there has even been 55 members of the Howard Stern Whack Pack for Christ's sake…and those dudes are Whack! What's that say about your crew ladies? Remembering back to a prank the girls pulled on a 38 year old college kid even more shows how cunty these girls are, while also showing yet another example of Mother's Day poking fun at stereotypical Slasher conventions. Jackie (I think), meets up with some dude nicknamed the Dobber (Peter Fox) on a baseball mound for a little late night naughty business. She tells Dobber to get ready while she goes and lets loose the lemonade. He then takes off all his gear, right down to his "gear" and starts doing push ups! All the while, Jackie meets up with the rest of the jerk off girls and they turn on all of the baseball field's lights, exposing the Dobber's Dobber for everyone to see. When I say everyone, I mean all three members of the Rat Pack…because they have no other friends.

That flashback is something that can be found in many a Slasher film, giving a possible motive to a character in the Dobber to possibly seek revenge on the girls for what they had done to him. As stated previously, up until the girls are attacked in the woods, Mother's Day is a flat out lampoon of the genre with random, conventional Slasher situations like the Dobber one, along with some funny POV shots. I was actually quite enjoying the humor as I found it all to be very smart and witty, and I looked forward to what was to come in the second half of the film. Surprisingly enough, the movie takes a bit of a different turn throughout the rest of the film. As the Asshole Pack are out camping they are very suddenly and from straight outta nowhere, attacked by a duo of hillbillies in what is a serious and somewhat frightening fashion.

The Rat Pack are packed up and taken away by the two hillbillies (complete with scissor tattered clothing and all) named Ike (Frederick Coffin) and Addley (Michael McCleery) where they are then brought back to their palacial home in the woods. At some point, the girls are introduced to the leader and birth giver of Ike and Addley, simply known as, Mother (Beatrice Pons). This crazy family is something else for sure; as Mother demands her boys wipe their feet and give mommy a kiss before they show off their freshest female catch. From here on out, Mother's Day is more akin to something like The Texas Chainsaw Massacre in tone and feel than it does a straightforward Slasher parody. Slightly mean spirited and exploitative, with a lot less humor, Mother's Days female characters from this point on, are put through a series of torturous situations that are very seriously realised and executed. They are tied up to exercise equipment and are degraded mentally and physically by their antagonists. They are let free at one point, but only to take part in a sadistic mock movie (or a kind of role-play) where the set up results in the raping of one of the females.

While I wouldn't call all of this second half as mean spirited as other movies of this genre type, but it's the humorous first half that misleads and keeps you from being ready for it all when it does go that darker direction. Humor is still there to a point, but that is mostly due to the silliness of the Mother and her two sons who put out fun yet campy performances while still being somewhat menacing. One scene that is just completely outrageous is when Ike and Addley are told by Mother to do their daily training. You are then subjected to a hysterical outdoor workout regimen that consists of watermelon destruction, one-armed push-ups, and smashing the windows in their own house! I can only guess that they are training for a possible attack on their compound, or possibly it is to keep up their strength for when they capture future ladies. But, why they need to break windows in their own house is beyond me…must be mad cold in the wintertime.

What really works in Mother's Day are the performances by the Dickhead Pack themselves. Mother, Ike, and Addley put them through the ringer, as they are continuously beat up and down. You can't help but think they deserve it in a way because of how bad they are as people before they are taken prisoner, like maybe these girls needed to be put through something terrible to kind of put them in their place so they can realize they aren't above or better than everyone else. Keeping from being to spoiler-ish I wont say who, but the girl that was raped during the role play movie scene, is separated from the other two girls. Tired, tattered, and torn, the remaining two girls then devise an escape and rescue plan that leads to a great little scene of self brutality. As the boys are busy play fighting outside, one of the girls gets into a sleeping bag and is lowered out of a window by the other girl so she can come back and unlock the door from the outside. Of course people are pretty friggin heavy and unsurprisingly the boys end up right outside the window resulting in the character gripping the rope for dear life as not to let the hillbilly sons catch them escaping. It's a pretty tense scene and also results in a severely deep rope gash in the girls hand that looked very real and quite painful.

Again, keeping away from spoiler territory, the girls do end up rescuing their friend and then try to find a way to escape to safety. Unfortunately, things do not work out as planned and one of the girls dies causing the other two women to make the decision to go after and take revenge on their one-time captors in honor of their long time friend's death and for what they were put through. It is a nice character arch for the remaining females as they go from one-time bitches that think they are better than everyone else, to finding out that they aren't so above it all when they become the targets of a family of deranged hicks. Eventually they snap out of being helpless victims and go into full on vengeance mode taking things into their own hands. How things pan out from here is for you to find out, but I will say that there is a surprise little ending that I thought was cool, while also keeping up with the humor found in the first portion of the movie.

It seems strange to have a film go from a Slasher spoof to an almost exploitation type of film (which is very similar to what Hostel did 25 years later), but it was a smart decision to have the very funny tongue in cheek first half lead into what is a much more dark second portion of the film. I liked and give credit to the writers and filmmakers of Mother's Day for doing what they did, and I enjoyed how the female characters turned out by the end of the film as I hated these girls from the start, but by time the rape scene happens, you begin to root for them. Acting wise, the girls are great and the family of scrubs are fun to watch as they all put forth good, fitting to their characters performances. My favorite of the deranged duo was Ike played by Frederick Coffin who has done a lot of film and television and is really the only actor outside of Mother herself, Beatrice Pons to have done anything more than a few films. There is a few great death scenes and the film is decently made considering the low budget-ness of it all.

So, if you are looking for something a little different from your average, uncreative, cheap 80's Slasher film, Mother's Day is a good time to be had. To be fair, I don't go into a movie like Mother's Day thinking it's going to be great or that it will be anything outside of a schlock filled, unoriginal good time, and to a point it is those things. However, Mother's Day is at times very funny, with a few smart qualities about it while going a direction I would have never expected it to with the amount of genres it successfully treads upon.

You Spin Me Right Round, Baby Right Round...

I wasn't all that impressed with Adam Green's 2006 "Old School American Horror" film, Hatchet. I thought it was an okay, somewhat fun movie that I can enjoy to a point, but not love. I do give Green credit, however, for making it and for the marketing that went behind the film, as it was really geared towards horror fans with no soft bullshit about it. Since hearing about Green's 2007 (almost immediate) follow up, Spiral, I found my interest piqued. I've been curious to see if Green can actually make a film that was described as a complete 180 from what Hatchet was - a gore-fest throwback to the American Slasher - and make a psychological thriller in the way of Spiral.

Green doesn't go it alone and shares the Directors spotlight with "Triple Thrash Threat," Joel David Moore, who also is the films lead and with Jeremy Danial Boreing, one of the writers on Spiral…this dudes a maniac! I love shit like that; a guy in Moore (who also was the star of Hatchet) that is so invested and has so much involvement in a film…really shows he has a lot of passion for cinema.

We first meet Mason (Moore) in his apartment as he is having a sort of psychotic breakdown. He calls his only friend Berkeley (Zachary Levi) to tell him that he has done something terrible but a not to worried Berkeley just tells him to calm down, take a hit off of his inhaler and go back to bed. The next morning, Mason shows up to work and we learn that his friend Berkeley is also his boss at an auto insurance office. It's pretty clear that Mason is a socially awkward loner who talks to almost no one except for his good looking, cool guy boss and only buddy, Berkeley. While Mason is eating lunch on a bench outdoors one day, a girl named Amber (Amber Tamblyn) joins Mason and begins talking with him. Even though he doesn't seemed too interested or even having much to say back to Amber, she continues to talk and try to befriend the shy Mason anyways. After some time, Mason and Amber begin to build a relationship. Amber becomes a model for Mason (who is an accomplished artist), who is painting a series of portraits of her. As the two begin to push their relationship further and get closer and closer, Amber starts to see signs that something is a little off about Mason. She's not quite sure what, though, but her "Amber Alert" is going off for sure. Now, around this point is where Mason begins to act different towards Amber, as he slowly unravels and "Spirals!" out of control. How Rude!

Spiral is more of a slow burn thriller reminiscent of a Hitchcock film as many would describe it, and I myself can attest to those thoughts. It is very much a character driven film, with characters that I (for the most part) like and at times can even slightly relate to in some way. These are people that you may know in one way or another, whether it be friends, family, co-workers, or even possibly yourself.

I love that Mason (who rocks a Members Only Jacket that would make a few good buddies very proud!) on the surface, is a loner/loser, but underneath that pathetic exterior, is a man who really has a lot going for him. As stated before, Mason is a very good artist that takes his craft very seriously. He is also a major Jazz enthusiast that has a vast knowledge and love of the genre. These are hardly traits of a person that I would consider to be a loser…socially awkward? Sure, but not a loser in the same sense that maybe his best friend Berkeley is.

Berkeley is the successful, good looking, go getter, that on the surface most men would aspire to be like. But, under that facade, the real Berkeley is an insecure womanizer, who is more concerned with his image and other people's perception of him, than he is of being himself. This is a great dynamic for the Mason/Berkeley characters, as for most of the movie it appears that Berkeley maybe almost uses Mason to feel better about himself. A great example of this character comparison is Berkeley is always trying to get Mason to work on his "free throw" shot, and Mason could care less about Basketball, let alone perfecting his shot. I love that every time we see Berkeley take a free throw, (past the foul line I might add) he misses. Really sums up the differences between the two characters in a nice way.

Our other main character, Amber, is the pretty girl who you would never expect to want any sort of involvement with a guy like Mason. Realistically though, Amber is a kind of strange, hyper girl, filled with random thoughts that she has no issue with spilling out verbally without any censor or forethought. For her, she seems to be attracted to Mason because he more than likely wouldn't judge her and her somewhat charmingly cute but out there perky personality. Traits that a guy like Berkeley would find irritating in a woman after only a few minutes spent with her. Amber can be herself with Mason without any fear of him judging her, and I think she knows this, thus her attraction to him.

By the third act of Spiral, I found myself really rooting for Amber and Mason's relationship to work. I started to really like what they were building and that makes for a better psychotic downfall for the Mason character in the film. You don't want to see it happen with more being at stake for these characters, even though that's what you are essentially watching the movie for in the first place. Mason and Amber are characters that are very likable when on screen together as they bring the best out of one another.

All of the acting as far as our main three characters go is very strong. Moore, who normally plays more comedy, fits right into the role of the off kilter Mason. He is at his best at the times when he goes a little mad and some of the scenes towards the end involving his breakdown are genuinely creepy due to his strong performance. I could have cared less about "Joan of Arcadia" before seeing Spiral, but Tamblyn is pretty great and won me over with her charm by the films end. Levi comes from a theater background and is also the star of the NBC TV series Chuck. Levi has some impressive acting chops, and he also has a very natural star quality about him too, so it's not much of a surprise that he landed a network TV gig, and I am sure we will see a lot more from the young actor in the future.

Even outside of the great characters and acting, Spiral is one hell of a nicely made film with a lot of techniques used. Beautiful cinematography, with many nice long continuous panoramic shots, the slight fish eye lenses that are used are very well executed, and the way the camera moves around is amazing. Filmed in Portland Oregon, Spiral has some nice locations that are usually enveloped in rain, creating a nice dismal and haunting effect. I also dug the settings from Mason's drab, dull place of employment to his very eye catching, artistic apartment. Very impressive work for a film only made for $650k I might add.

Also, I should mention the incredible Jazz music used in the film, which was actually a band that played along to the movie itself and quite well at that. I'm not a Jazz guy for what it's worth, but I can appreciate it and its use in the film. This music really fits the tone of Spiral, from smooth to chaotic depending on how a scene may be playing out at any given moment.

Being that Spiral is rated PG-13 and has very little violence and absolutely no bloodshed, it may not be every ones cup of purple stuff. But, if you're looking for a nicely paced, slow burn, character driven psychological thriller, that at times has elements of a good romantic (BARF!) drama, then Spiral is for you my hairy little friend. Spiral is a film made by a group of good friends, that have and will continue to work together, hopefully putting out work as solid and cared for as Spiral is. I look forward to future projects from this crew of filmmakers who have really shown that they have a great love for the art form of cinema.

Bravo Mr. Green, Bravo.

The Fangoria Weekend post

I wanted to do a quick little post regarding our trip to the Fangoria convention that was held in NYC this past weekend. I figured I should put something on record before my epic chronicling of this coming weekends convention in Connecticut. Quick side note, if you purchased issue 6 or have a contributors copy coming your way, it will ship out next week. We thank you for your patience *insert smiley face here*.

As we approached the Jacob Javits center Sunday afternoon, we were struck by how barren it seemed. The only other time we had ventured to the massive and ever so shiny building was during Comic Con 2008. Let me tell you, that place was packed. Every inch was bursting with patrons, both costumed and un. I suppose I just assumed that was always how these events were. When we arrived at the area that held the Fangoria convention, I was shocked at how small it was. Not just small for the Javits center, but small in comparison to shows I've been to.

We quickly did a round and I was frankly unimpressed. If I've seen Tom Savini's scowling mug once I've seen it a thousand times. There were very few vendors and there just seemed to be little to look at. Being the silver lining kinda gal I am, I decided that Ms. Marilyn Burns was worth the price of admission and I chatted her up. Not only did I get a super adorable picture with her, I was also able to get the answer to a question that has long plagued me. My talented and all round lovely partner thinks I am color blind and unable to see the true shade of Sally's tank top in Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I always said Sally's tank top is purple; Dylan said blue. I knew it was purple. Marilyn Burns said it was purple and she was the only one actually there. So I am right!

After our brief encounter with Ms. Burns we did another round on the floor, peeking into the Q&A with Maniac Cop director William Lustig. Just when we were about to call it a day Dylan, with his eagle eye, spotted none other than Maitland McDonagh. Now, if you don't know who Maitland McDonagh is, you should click on the link I provided. If you'd like to know why I nearly swallowed my tongue upon seeing her, read on. McDonagh is a phenomenal author and provides some of the most poignant and insightful film critique I've ever encountered. We have seen her speak on a panel along with other film critics to discuss horror as a viable film genre. She was also super on that Bravo special 100 Scariest Movie Moments. I guess you could say I idolize this woman. I used my nifty deductive reasoning skills to figure she was most likely there for Argento as she has written one of the premiere books on his films. We followed her right into his Q&A.


McDonagh was the moderator for Argento's "panel". It was interesting enough. Admittedly, we had very little idea what anyone was talking about. Argento's accent is thick. I found myself roped in by McDonagh's questions but then I would quickly realize I had no clue what his answer was. It was still a nice experience to happen upon. After they had left the stage Argento retreated behind a curtain to sign autographs. I didn't mind, I was stalking Maitland. I approached her and told her how excited I was by her surprise appearance and how I loved her book, Filmmaking on the Fringe (I recommend that one highly). She was actually super nice and easy to talk to. I went from shrill fangirl to normal human being in the blink of an eye.

I am pleased to say the trip into the borough of Manhattan was thoroughly worth it.
You should also take a look at Maitland McDonagh's site here.

Creature Feature Double Feature: Dance of the Eaten Girl

I watched 2008's Dance of the Dead, soon followed by 2005's Boy Eats Girl and thought since they're both teen zombie films, it would be a good idea to make this post a sort of "double feature" if you will. A compare and contrast of two movies with similar themes and ideas that at the same time are as different as can be form one another. I couldn't say that either of these two films are very original, especially in the over abundant zombie market over the more recent years, but it is how each of these films are handled that makes them so opposite from each other.

I'll go with a super tight (for me at least) synopsis of both films, then go over the weak and strong points, followed by some side by side of what works in one film and what doesn't work in another.

Boy Eats Girl: Nathan (David Leon) is having major issues with getting together with his long time best friend and crush, Jessica (Samantha Mumba). Thinking she is "doing" some other dude, Nathan locks himself in his room and gets bombed leading to his accidental suicide (?). In an attempt to bring her son back from the dead; Nathans mother uses a stolen book of something or other to resurrect her deceased child. Of course, it doesn't go right and Nathan is now an unofficial member of the living dead. Oh the horror. He slowly begins to show signs of infection and when confronted by a bully, Nathan attacks his antagonist turning him into a full on, flesh eating, zombie. Zombie bully=lots of peoples becoming zombies at a rapid pace and now with the help of some friends, Nathan must stop the epidemic while dealing with advancing zombie urges and his teenage love issues.

Directed by Stephen Bradley, this Irish zombie film is the more serious of the two movies, which is a surprise with a title riffing on a Ben Savage led teen television show. It's not devoid of humor, just treads darker territory with Nathan contemplating suicide before it actually happens and then following Nathan through his slow change into a zombie. The idea of following a character through the slow zombie changing process has been done more than once and much better than how Boy Eats Girl handles the decline from human to flesh eater.

I thought some of the characters were okay and actually enjoyed most of the acting, especially David Leon's performance as an unsure teen, going through the hard knocks of high school life and the even more difficult task of figuring out the almighty woman. But overall, I didn't have much interest in what happened to anyone. Quite frankly, I barely care enough to even remember anything about any of them. I could partially blame that on nothing all that interesting happening in the film and most importantly, the zombie attack doesn't even happen till the third act of the movie! Snooze.

The zombie scenes are pretty plain and lackluster to say the least, not a good thing when watching a zombie movie I might add. There were one or two very cool/fun things that happened, but they weren't memorable or original enough for me to recall exactly what they were. Some of the (very little) zombie stuff was poorly shot and one scene in particular that would seem to be the films proverbial zombie money shot should have been very neat, but ultimately failed due to poor camera setup and editing. In the scene, one of the females uses some sort of big farming machine on a bunch of zombies, that because of the bad camerawork, I could barely even tell exactly what the contraption was, let alone see the zombie slaughter clearly enough to enjoy it.

Dance of the Dead: It's prom night, as all the teens are getting ready to head out to their prom, a few nerdy (and dateless) ghost explorers unexpectedly run into zombies just as they begin to rise form the dead. Now it's up to a group of losers and rejects to try to stop the zombie horde from making it to the prom and annihilating their entire senior class. The group is lead by class clown and rebel, Jimmy (Jared Kusnitz) who had ended up with no date due to his perfectionist girlfriend, Lindsey (Greyson Chadwick) breaking it off when she grew tired of his immature ways. Now, Jimmy finds himself having to rise to the occasion and show he isn't just some jerk off kid by proving himself to his now ex-girlfriend and stopping the zombie invasion from getting to the prom and eating his classmates.

With Gregg Bishop behind the directing duties, Dance of the Dead looks slightly different from your average zombie film. I found Dance to be shoot and edited very similar to any one of those preteen/teen TV shows like Dawson's or Degrassi (not that I would know or anything…). While I found it off putting at first, it soon became very clear that Dance is a sort of parody of those types of TV shows and as the first 10 minutes or so of the film went on, I found myself kinda getting into the teen drama found within the movie?!

While the characters are all very stereotypical of films set in high schools, it's very clear that they're meant to be and for the most part this is pulled off with everyone seemingly in on the joke. Couple of the stand out characters for me was school bully, Kyle played by Justin Welborn and Coach Keel as portrayed by Mark Oliver. Both characters are very different from one another, but both are badass and while not being original at all, are very fun to watch in the film…especially Kyle.

As for the zombie action, Dance of the Dead is very cool and gets going pretty quickly with the zombie attack. There is a few great zombie involved sequences that will have you cheering and while it's getting difficult too find creative ways to kill the living dead, Dance has some great moments and zombie deaths that I hadn't seen before. One of Dance's best scenes by far is the zombie resurrection. I have always loved when zombies rise from the grave as it is visually very pleasing to the eyes, but the way it's handled in Dance is way cool and something I hadn't seen before. A few of the characters are running through a graveyard as zombies are launched from their graves, into the air, and literally hit the ground running right along with the frightened teens.

So, I think it should be clear that I liked Dance of the Dead as opposed to Boy Eats Girl. Even though I said that Boy Eats Girl is the more serious of the two films, it does have moments of attempted humor and I say attempted because the comedy doesn't really work as opposed to Dance of the Dead, which pulls off being a solid horror comedy. Dance works as a film of this genre and it is more along the lines of Shaun of the Dead or even more so something like Return of the Living Dead. Maybe not quite as good as those two films in my opinion, but most definitely in the same ballpark. Dance could possibly be this generations equivalent of Return (which it takes a lot of cues from) and I say that from the eyes of a 32 year old dude that may not have any clue what them there kids, be liking these here days, so I could be wrong in that assumption.

Neither film is scary, but this reaction is more an attribute being put forth by Boy Eats Girl as opposed to Dance of the Dead. However, it was actually Dance that gave me the only jolt in either of the films and happened when the characters have their first zombie encounter. It was more of a jump scare, but it got me. Scary or not, I expect some undead action in my zombie films. I know I know, I'm being selfish, but to have to wait till the final act of a "zombie" movie (that's also boring!) to actually have some real zombie action, is just bullshit to me and I hated that about Boy Eats Girl. Dance gets shit going at a nice pace and delivers on some great zombie moments that Boy Eats Girl did not. On top of the too little too late zombie stuff, at no time does any boy eat any girl…not even in a sexual way. Which actually would have been a smart and kinda funny play on the films title, but nope, nothing of the sort.

The biggest glaring difference between the two films is just how they are handled. I've already said numerous times that both films lack originality, but with Dance it's meant to be this way as it is a zombie film that is also a parody of teen television, teenagers themselves and does all of this with success and a sense of care brought forth by the filmmakers. The stereotypical teens and situations in Boy Eats Girl are just that, stereotypical. Outside of the suicide elements, there is very little brought to the table by Boy Eats Girl and the film just feels flat and somewhat pointless in comparison to Dance.

I don't really think Boy Eats Girl is a terrible movie by any stretch and I'm sure a few folks may find some joy in watching it. However (unlike She Devils on Wheels), I couldn't even find enough good elements to give the movie the third Netflix star, relegating it too the sad and lonely world of two stars. I however really enjoyed Dance of the Dead and what it was attempting to do with its tongue in cheek comedic sensibilities. The best way to maybe compare these two zombie flicks is to take a look at the two films male leads and the journey their characters go through. Dances Jimmy is a jackass on the surface that finds himself having to step up and do what he can to keep him and his friends alive, along with proving to his ex that he can be more than just a class clown…kinda like beneath the surface of Dance of the Dead is a film successful in being more than your average zombie film with filmmakers that step up and try and make an actual good fun zombie film. Non-Girl Eating Nathan is a character that is trying to deal with the slow process of becoming a flesh-eating member of the living dead…where as Boy Eats Girls just deals with being a slow-paced zombie film with nothing really going for it in the living dead department.

So, yeah…unless you're a zombie enthusiast, skip Boy Eats Girl and toss on a tux or a sky blue dress and check out Dance of the Dead. Who knows, maybe you’ll get lucky afterwards.

Return to Sleepaway Camp

Very rarely do I just not finish watching a movie. We shut Return to Sleepaway Camp off half way through. I don't intend on ever slogging thorough the latter half. Since I didn't complete the film, I thought, who am I to blog about it. Well, here I sit, blogging about it.

I can't say I have a venomous distaste for RTSC. It's a joke. The film never took itself seriously. The tone is too silly to allow one to hate it. The acting was terrible. The dialogue is goofy. The "plot" is thin and I'm pretty sure we figured out the "spoiler" by the time we shut it off. Sure, it elicited a few chuckles, but again I say, the whole film is a joke. If you watch it, you will laugh at it.

I have heard people say that RTSC contains one of the most annoying characters in horror film history. That would be the character of Alan. You will spot him instantly and yes he is awful. You will most likely want him to die. I don't think that's something to be proud of but this film doesn't have much else going for it. I can't even say this movie is a vehicle to deliver a cornucopia of awesome camp kills. Like I said, we got half way through and only 2 people had died. It wasn't even anything to write home about.

If you want my opinion, Return to Sleepaway Camp is a total waste of time. It's filled with kids who are way too old to be at camp, and I didn't even see any nudity. If this film got awesome in the second half, let me know and I may try again. But as of now, I am happy to have that 40 minutes of my life.

Now Gimme Some Candy!

I love the holiday known as Halloween for a slew of reasons, reasons that are way too many to elaborate on in this quick post. The first time I saw the trailer for Trick 'r Treat, I was very excited to say the least. An anthology film set during my favorite holiday, which looked to encapsulate all of the visual images and themes I love about the Halloween aesthetic.

It seems like forever ago when I saw the first trailer for the Michael Dougherty horror anthology film, Trick 'r Treat. Actually, it was forever ago…in fact, Trick 'r Treat was originally slated to be released "in theaters" October 5th of 2007. It never happened, as for no good reason, the movie was pushed back continuously, living a life in movie limbo, as all of us horror fans have had to suffer waiting to see the critically, very well received movie.

Well, now it finally appears that Trick 'r Treat will *knock on wood* be coming out on DVD and Blu-Ray this coming October, along with a festival run (starting sometime in July) leading up to the DVDs release. I honestly kinda forgot about the movie, maybe I blocked it out of my mind thinking it would never come to see the light of day. Maybe perhaps I was just completely tired of the bullshit, absolutely no reason at all, wait for a movie that simply looked great. Of course, I am beyond myself with excitement about this news, but still have a bitter bone about the film not being put out into a wide theatrical release. Seems a little (and by little, I mean a lot) unfair that horror in theaters is filled with (mostly) shitty remakes and the almost as shitty slew of Saw flicks, while Trick 'r Treat sat on a shelf waiting for any sorta release. However, this is neither the time nor the place for that discussion either…I will just look on the bright side and patiently wait to finally get my grubby little paws on Trick 'r Treat this October. Now, my hopes are all high again, so this movie had better come out and the shit better be good too.

Checkity Check Yourself Before You [REC] Yourself!

I'll start off by mentioning that my top two favorite films of last year went to [REC] and Let the Right One In. Being a lifetime horror fan, it was an easy decision to make, made even easier by two films that are straight up phenomenal exercises in the horror film making. I think that I should make it clear that I hold [REC] in very high regard and it is a film that took not one, but two of the most difficult and (for some) overused staples in recent cinema history, and made them work to amazing effect. [REC] uses a film making technique (in Cinéma Vérité) that some would consider to be a gimmicky, limited style, and they used it to perfection. Even in the over-saturated zombie market, Jaume Balaguero and Paco Plaza found a way to make [REC] fresh and inventive, all done with respect, knowledge, and care to the horror genre and cinema in general. Plus…the movie is as scary as bumpy private parts. Nuff said.

Of course I have been somewhat anticipating the sequel to [REC] but, the teasers were just that, teases, and nothing that got me overly excited. Now, after seeing this new trailer for the follow up to one of my two favorite films from last year, my excitement and anticipation have gone up ten fold. In fact, this trailer made me [REC] my underwear upon first viewing. You think I'm kidding?! Watch the trailer, then go wipe your shit-ridden ass, then watch the trailer again! If you have eaten Raisin Bran in the last 24 hours, be forewarned…



Tell me that trailer didn't get you a little e[rec]t?! I think Todd Brown over at Twitch, hit the nail on the head in comparing [REC] 2 to Aliens as it looks like the sequel is taking the next conceivable step in the story, while keeping it fresh and far from being just an unoriginal rehash of what worked for the first film. It certainly cant hurt to go all out with the action either and also makes for an impressively cool looking new Vérité camera style, being mounted helmet cameras worn by pump action shotgun wielding, bad ass mofo's. Balaguero and Paco Plaza being back together for the sequel is also very promising. I think both of these guys know what they are doing when it comes to making horror movies and understand the correct logical path for making [REC] 2 an (hopefully) amazing follow up, to what is an already classic film in the horror genre. It seems I may need to redo that most anticipated list again…

Shotgun Stories (2007)

Like a horse to tasty water, The Gentlemen's Guide To Midnite Cinema once again introduced me to a great film I otherwise wouldn't have seen. This time it's 2007's Shotgun Stories, starring Michael Shannon (who was nominated for a best supporting actor Academy Award for Revolutionary Road) and a perfectly cast roster of virtually unknown actors. Shotgun Stories is about three sons (aptly named Son, Kid & Boy) whose father walks out on them as children, only to quit drinking, find God, remarry and father another four sons who he actually cared for (and named). Son, Boy & Kid were left to be raised in poverty by their bitter mother. Years later when the father dies, Son & company show up at the funeral. Son expresses his feelings about his dead biological father, to the dismay of his four grieving half brothers. This action is the catalyst that sets the story of warring families into motion. The setting of this film is almost as important as the plot. Shotgun Stories takes place in a poverty stricken small town in Arkansas, which conveys that feeling of hopelessness that can often hang over a small town. This wouldn't have been the same movie if it was set anywhere but the South.



















"The plot points that make up Shotgun Stories could take place anywhere, but if it were made in a different place the result would be a totally different film. Southeast Arkansas is a slow burn kind of place. The people move at a steady pace against a backdrop of vast farmland...This is not a film that could be made anywhere else..." - Director Jeff Nichols on the importance of shooting in Arkansas. Nichols does an amazing job of capturing the essence of the Arkansas "slow burn" on film.

Another piece of the puzzle that makes Shotgun Stories such a great watch is Michael Shannon's performance. I'm not familiar with much of his work but after seeing this, I need to be. Shannon plays Son Hayes quietly. Even as Son delivers his speech at his estranged father's funeral, he never raises his voice. Shannon's portrayal of Son comes off as endearing and at times equally as intimidating, like a Southern Clint Eastwood. Not to short sell the rest of the cast, everyone does a great job.



If you haven't seen this film, I highly recommend it. If you have seen it, check out GGtMC's take on Shotgun Stories HERE. Also, if you see the movie poster above for sale somewhere, let me know. Or surprise me for my birthday!

Ssshe Moves in HISSSterious Ways

Yeah I know, I know...I just wrote a blog about two movies with animals as the main subject matter, but this one is very different from those two films I previously wrote about, so I think I can get a passss…right? Either way, everything from the trailer, to all of the stills that have come out for the upcoming Jennifer Lynch film, Hisss look fantastic. Hisss's story sounds simple enough…"as a shape shifting snake queen (or Nagin) heads into the city to search for her Cobra lover-boy (how sssilly!) that was captured by an American hunter, all the while, a police officer is hot on her tail trying to stop her vengeful rampage."

Based off Eastern mythology, Hisss (previously known as Nagin: The Snake Woman) is a U.S. and India co-production that was actually shot both in English, and Hindi language. Though, it is not the first Indian film to tackle the hissstorical Nagin character, which in this updated version is played by beautiful Bollywood starlet, Mallika Sherawat. However, this is the first time I have ever been introduced to this mythological character and I must say that I am most certainly intrigued.

Though it's a kinda boring film, I am a pretty big fan of the 1973 Dirk Benedict yarn Sssssss, which also delved Diamond Head first into the body horror sub genre of snake/human transformation. While Faceman is one sexy ass bitch, I think Mallika Sherawat has a better shot at making the snake in my grass slither, and while the idea of a shape shifting snake woman sounds like it could be very hokey, the trailer for Hisss is showing otherwise. On the surface, it would appear that Hisss has a pretty out there, surreal quality about it, and the filmmakers are really taking things seriously here and staying away from the cheesy direction they could easily head towards.

Robert Kurtzman is behind the awesome looking snake woman design and all of the FX work in the trailer is phenomenally done, with no noticeable CGI yucky-ness that you would come to expect from a movie like this. I also love some of the imagery shown, namely the shot of Nagin slithering up the lamppost is very cool and realistic looking. Also, some of the quick transformation shots you see in the trailer are very creative and pleasing to the eyes.

No official release date has been set as of yet but it looks as if Hisss will (hopefully) make its way to some sort of screen this year. Apparently, the film makers are looking at unconventionally promoting the film using digital media like DVDs, XBOX games and CD's. Also, Radical comics is planning to possibly make a set of Graphic Novels based on the Nagin character as played by Sherawat. So it would seem that someone thinks this movie could be something big with the new to the Western world star Mallika Sherawat (who could possibly give Megan Fox a run for her money...possibly) and her latest snake woman character. As I said earlier…I am most sssertainly intrigued.

Oh yeah...make sure to check out the dope ass trailer!